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EDDIE IN THE IPD..! (A hilarious patient-doctor engagement episode)

Written by Rajandeep Singh

[One fine day during a routine morning visit by the IPD Medic, at a renowned multi-speciality hospital]

Doctor : Morning Edward..! How you feeling today..?

Eager Edward : Oh Hello Doc, I am still the way you left me yesterday. All plastered up and nowhere to go (Eddie is always as perky as his name suggests)

Doctor : Don’t worry, we will be sending you home soon. (As he carries on his routine visit duties)

Eager Edward : But Doctor, my bones are all set now. I can feel them healing inside (closes his eyes and smiles, imitating a yogic stance, rather unsuccessfully though). I should be sent home now.

Doctor : Huh…? Edward, you were brought in a day ago with 1 broken leg, 2 broken ribs, 1 broken hand, 1 dislocated shoulder, 7 stitches on the forehead, a black eye and not forget a missing tooth.

Eager Edward : So what, haven’t you gone through my medical history, Doctor? I am a gifted person, I always heal faster than the average Joes out there. (Doctor rolls his eyes, while Eddie smirks showing a gap in his teeth)

Doctor : Tell me something, when was the last time you got “MIRACULOUSLY HEALED” Edward..?

Eager Edward : Huh…? (Thinks deeply) Oh yeah, got it. The last time I had an upset tummy, I was okay within a day on my own. Never went to the hospital. It was a miracle Doctor, trust me. (Eddie gives a victorious smile with his front tooth missing in action)

Doctor : (with eyes wide in shock) Edward, you can’t compare an upset stomach to half a dozen broken bones, buddy. Try and understand.

(Eddie gets upset and turns his face towards the window)

Eager Edward : That’s it, Doctor. You don’t trust me or care about my feelings. It cannot work out between us. I better see other Doctors from now on.

[The Doctor nods his head in agreement and walks away still trying to figure out, what just happened back there]

About the author

Rajandeep Singh

Founder of KiviHealth , trying to democratise healthcare using automation and AI